Top Three Reasons Why We Fall in Love

According to Hani Henry, chair and associate professor of psychology in the Department of Sociology, Anthropology, Psychology and Egyptology at AUC, Robert Sternberg's psychological theory covers the most common reasons why we fall in love, namely: intimacy, passion and commitment.

Intimacy

Intimacy can be described as a simple friendship that lacks passion and commitment.  status on attitude  said that intimacy is not only about building a close relationship with someone; it can also be used for self-enhancement. Sometimes it is self-serving. Everyone needs to feel loved, cared for, and respected. Women need to feel their femininity while men desire their masculinity.

A perfect example of intimacy captured is Adele's Hi. In the song's chorus, Adele contacts her ex-boyfriend and pours out her heartbreak from the relationship. She explains that many years have passed and she hasn't done much healing. "Her lyrics speak for many people who are looking to make an emotional connection, whether it's with someone they know or in a relationship that lasts a few months," he explained.

Passion

The normal thing to do is fall in love due to strong feelings or desire. Passionate love develops from feelings that lead to sexual attraction and romantic interest. "When you see someone you like, you are captivated by something that draws you to that person," explained Henry. "The attraction to someone is physical and there is a fascination about the hair and eyes as well as their bodies."

In the absence of intimacy and commitment, infatuation is developed with the person you love. "People are drawn and quickly develop lust. Some people are obsessed and see that person as a type of object. He stated that it is possible to be together for years with someone and not feel a commonality.

Commitment

Commitment is complete love. He stated that those who are committed want stability and a healthy partner. "People who seek only commitment can be unable to find basic friendship and sexual attraction.

Henry stated that today's young adults are more concerned about objects than they are about relationships. "The objectification comes from consumerism," he explained. "The more consumerism a culture becomes the more people lose interest and commitments. Some youth are more concerned with impressing people they don’t care about. Therefore, it is important to eat everything and have good relationships with others.

Love Outside the Triangular Theory

Sternberg's love theory can be understood by anyone. But we all have our own reasons for falling madly in love. "Your reasons for falling in love don't necessarily have to be scientifically explained. Henry explained that certain personal needs may include fear of being alone, social pressure, satisfaction, or religious beliefs.

No matter what psychology says about love, our choice of type of love defines who we are. Each person has their own understanding of what makes them happy and fulfills their human needs. "Some people find themselves with a need for each dimension of the triangle. However, they can't give up one of their needs because of the many. Love is complex.